Watching the Sopranos puts you Six Feet Under.

HBO On Demand. I find out after how many months that we already pay for HBO
ON Demand? Aparently with no extra cost (besides the monthly fee they already
have us paying and we didn’t know it) I can go and take my remote and click
my way into almost any HBO show, movie, or special.

Over the past few days I’ve watched the first 6 episodes of Six Feet Under and
right now I’m on my 4th Sopranos episode (this one is number 21).
I’m seeing dead people and angry mobsters everywhere. Tony Soprano…
Tony Soprano… The only thing I can say about him is that I’m glad I don’t
identify with him. But the idea that he might scares me.

Nate from Six Feet Under. He’s a thirty something year old who comes home
for christmass to have his father die and then ends up staying. He’s lost.
He doesn’t know where he blongs in life. He left Seattle (a very nice place I
might add), his job (wich was suposed to be temporary), his apartment
(which was suposed to be temporary), and everything he knew to come home and
join the family mourgatory bussniess which he spent his entire life running
away from. I like him. I can identify with him for some reason. He’s got to
find him self.

-Francis Gulotta

What a way to live

“If you follow your bliss,you put yourself on a kind of track, which has been there all the while waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living .”

-Joseph Campbell

A hard days work.

Yesterday a little girl ran up to me and hugged my leg hiding behind it. She thought I was her mother. I had seen her before in the Laundromat she was very proud that she got to put the money in the machine and was telling everyone much to her mothers dismay. She must have only been three. Anyway she had just gotten her self into a fight with the pizza guy. (“You can’t punch me!” “Yes I can!” “Ha! you just gave me five! I won’t give it back. You gave me five!”) Defeated she came and took shelter behind my leg. “Wrong person honey.” her mother charmed in. The girl looked up at me smiled and ran and hid behind her mother. She even thought it was funny.

On a note about the matrix I present you with this.

Work has been less then satisfying lately. Too much to do, to much shit to deal with. Don’t take up IT jobs if you can help it. Especially if you are the only person working there.


A guest update on Interpretation of the matrix reloaded

Recently Francis and I were talking about the matrix reloaded and I clarified some things he didn’t understand fully and one thing led to another and I ended up writing this post up so that more people might hear my opinion on what was happening in the matrix reloaded.

As some one who has seen the matrix reloaded more then once, I have
come to think I understand some of the more complicated symbolism and confusing aspects of
the plot. Parts of my interpretation requires you to understand a bit about
computers and programs

       The first question I had about the matrix came form the first movie,
but is really answered in reloaded. That question is about predetermination and
how did the oracle know the future? Now the answer to the question actually
comes form an idea that was first suggested by Isaac Newton, which is if we
knew the direction and velocity of every particle in the universe then we would
be able to predict the rest of time.

       Now this won’t work in real life be cause of some very good reasons
that I won’t go into here, but the matrix is a computer program and by the very
nature of computer program it’s very easy to know what they are going to do.
(Now here comes the math and computer knowledge) programs are made of
functions. Now for those of you that don’t remember about functions, by definition a
function will have only one answer for any set of variable (and example might be
Y=3X+5 or Y=3Z+4X -12). And that is true for all programs, you input variable
A and get answer B. So as long as the matrix works right you can take the
current state of thing (like a rock falling) and predict what will happen (it
will hit something) But also in this lies a problem.

       And this leads us to my second question about the matrix reloaded.
What was the “architect” talking about? When he said that the first matrix
failed, that there was a flaw, and that the intuitive program solved that problem?
Well now to understand that you have to go to one of the major themes of the
matrix, chose. That is why the first matrix failed.

       Humans aren’t programs, they are not functions, with a human if you
input a set of variable and you might get a different answer to what you have
gotten before. This is because the human mind is build on a concept alien to
programs, chose. And since humans are acting as part of a program they MUST act
like functions. This is why the oracle says “you have already made the chose
now you must understand it”. While put like this it is confusing what she is
actually saying is “when you have the input of 2 and 3 you make 5 now you must
understand why you make 5″(it’s addition by the way) she is trying to make him
understand that in the matrix chose is deeply suppressed.

       And how is it suppressed? That is a complicated question. I think it
lays in the subconscious, in belief. That is your only chose is to
subconsciously belief in the matrix or not. And one you have that chose you don’t need any
others. The architect’s statement supports this, that once the chose not to
believe was added, the matrix worked. But he also infers that this was just a
temporary fix that ultimately it did not solve all the problems. Now I have to
warn you my next conclusion is a bit hard to understand and may just make you
more confused, but if you get what I’m about to write you will understand how
neo stopped the sentinels.

       The architect’s statements infer that once the element of chose was int
roduce to grows, and remember what Morpheus said ” we have freed more minds
in the past 6 mouths then in the last 6 years”. What this means that the longer
humans have to chose, more will chose not to believe. This is why Zion must
be destroyed this is why “the system must be purged of the code”. You see
because people in Zion must believe also. This is because they are still part of
the program, they are still in matrix. Zion, the ships, the whole resistance is
just part of the program, another control. This is why the architect didn’t
want “the ultimate flaw to reveal it’s self”. The flaw was neo seeing he was
still in a computer, that he could just stop the sentinels with his mind like the
bullets he freezes in air.

       This leaded down a deeper whole, and asks more questions. Like “is the
war real?” and”are machines and AIs our enemy?” But we really can’t answer
these questions right now. So I’m just going to stop here and leave the rest up
to debate and maybe some one else will figure it out.


Rainy days.

I had just gotten back from PC Richards ran up the stairs of the park slope yoga center when I realized that I had no money and I hadn’t eaten. Scratch yoga again. I’ll make it into that place eventually. Instead I walked in the rain to the bank and got some cash and headed home. About a block after I had passed it I doubled back and went to key food. It was nice walking the isles. At first I tried to carry the food – I got to remember to take carts in these places.) I had some time with no chatter or problems just the idle thoughts of “Why would they charge that for this!?” and “I got to find something here that doesn’t taste good. If it taste good I’ll eat it.” And of course “I need a box of tissues that make it feel like I’m kissing a goddess every time I blow my nose. None of this double ply crap!” I figured spending $40 for a lot of food once beats $10 a meal 4 times eating out.

I’ve just got one question. Its not a hard one.
Why the fuck does cereal cost so much?
I mean it’s a box of starch. It’s less then bread. The cereal companies make a machine to produce it, hook up a supply of wheat, potatoes, old newspaper, what be it and poof cereal for the rest of time. Five fucking dollars for a box of Cheerios? I should move to a farm.


Email me if you get any leads.
I’m off to clean house and computer. It’s to the point where everything (in both places) is too messy to want to deal with. I’m now in an organizational fit. It’s time for good music, rainy days, and cool nights. All in all, I’m content.

One last thing before I go. I got a dollar! Thank you Allison! She used that pay pal link that some of you may have noticed off to the left there. Feel free to chip in!



I’m currently waiting for my laundry to finish drying. I’ve been cleaning and throwing stuff out all day. Well, that’s a lie I wasn’t up all day. For some reason I woke up around 5pm. I didn’t goto bed late or anything… I dunno what happened. Its almost 3am now and I have work tomorrow I need to sleep soon.

I’m happy to say I finally got my self a punchdown tool. Soon I’ll be getting a toner and a probe. I’ve been wanting these tools for a long time. =)

My laptop broke. I woke up one morning a few days ago to find it on the floor. Must have taken out some countisubconscious aggression while I was sleeping. I don’t know what to tell apple.